Quiznos 8865 Stanford Blvd Columbia, MD

In Columbia, MD today I walked into a Quiznos with my brother. We were taking a lunch break from a seminar. Have you ever been in a Quiznos? The menu baffles. Why are the sandwiches named after weapons? The tuna melt comes in either a "torpedo" or a "bullet". Would they offer a 'Nunchuks' salad? Or a 'machete' liverwurst? Weird. The tuna melt is itself a dichotomy, you are eating something essentially healthy, the tuna, but it is ruined by adding the cheese. It would be like jogging and smoking at the same time. I would classify it as a culinary gestalt. We sat down. We began to eat. We talked about Ayn Rand and 'Objectivism". My advice is to never do this. All of a sudden an intense pain erupted in my intestines. I felt a customer at another table looking at me and asking "Are you threatening me?" My brother and I quickly left the Quiznos. Overall, I would categorize this restaurant as something between astonishing and spectacular.